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The second roast of Donald Trump

Readers who are regular viewers of Comedy Central may recall that the network not long ago aired a roast of Donald Trump, the most recent in a series of profanity-laced celebrity roasts that the Viacom subsidiary has sponsored.

Earlier tonight, Trump was unexpectedly roasted for a second time in as many months – except this time, it was President Obama doing the roasting, rather than the likes of Lisa Lampanell, at the 2011 White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

Here’s the relevant excerpt:

PRESIDENT OBAMA: There’s a vicious rumor floating around that I think could really hurt Mitt Romney. I heard he passed universal healthcare when he was governor of Massachusetts. Someone should get to the bottom of that… and I know just the guy to do it. Donald Trump is here tonight!

Now, I know that he’s taken some flak lately, but no one is happier, no one is prouder, to put this birth certificate matter to rest than The Donald. And that’s because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter. Like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened in Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac?

All kidding aside, obviously, we all know about your credentials and breadth of experience. For example … no seriously, just recently, in an episode of Celebrity Apprentice – at the steakhouse – the men’s cooking team did not impress the judges from Omaha Steaks. And there was a lot of blame to go around, but you, Mr. Trump, recognized that the real problem was a lack of leadership, and so ultimately, you didn’t blame Lil Jon or Meat Loaf… you fired Gary Busey. And these are the kind of decisions that would keep me up at night.

Well handled, sir! Well-handled!

Say what you will about Mr. Trump… he certainly would bring some change to the White House. Let’s see what we’ve got up there.

The Donald Trump White House

Donald Trump's White House, as envisioned by President Obama (Courtesy of C-SPAN)

The New York Times reports that Trump did not take kindly to the jokes.

It was almost painful to watch, the juxtaposition of the president, flexing his new post-birther comedy chops, and the real estate mogul-cum-politician, grimacing at his table as Mr. Obama basked in his post-long-form-birth-certificate glow.

Maybe it was painful for the Times’ Helene Cooper, who doesn’t like to see rich white guys being roasted, but I enjoyed watching Trump’s discomfort immensely when the C-SPAN cameras panned to him. Trump deserved to be made fun of at length after all the silly nonsense he’s spouted on radio, cable television, and daytime talk shows. He was practically asking for a ribbing.

And he got one – both from the President and from Saturday Night Live’s Seth Meyers, the evening’s headliner. Seth wasn’t pulling any punches either:

SETH MEYERS: And then of course there’s Donald Trump. Donald Trump has been saying that he will run for president as a Republican, which is surprising, since I just assumed he was running as a joke.

Donald Trump often appears on Fox, which is ironic, because a fox often appears on Donald Trump’s head.

If you’re at the Washington Post table with Trump, and you can’t finish your entrĂ©e, don’t worry… the fox will eat it.

And if I can, for a moment, talk about the birther issue. When did we get so suspicious about where people were born?

A USA Today poll last week said thirty-eight percent of Americans think the President was definitely born in the U.S. In the same poll – in the very same poll – only five percent more said Donald Trump was definitely born in the U.S. Has it reached the point where Americans only think someone was born here if they saw it?

I know I was born here. And I know my younger brother was born here. But when it comes to my older brother… I can only take him at his word.

Gary Busey said recently that Donald Trump would make a great president. Of course, he said the same thing about an old rusty birdcage he found.

Donald Trump owns the Miss USA pageant, which is great for Republicans, because it will streamline their search for a vice president.

Donald Trump said recently he has a great relationship with the blacks. Though, unless “the Blacks” are a family of white people, I bet he’s mistaken.

I like that Trump is filthy rich, but nobody told his accent. His whole life is models and gold leaf and marble columns, but he still sounds like a know-it-all down at the O.T.B.

Mr. Trump may not be a good choice for president, but he would definitely make a great press secretary. How much fun would that be?

[imitating Trump]

Kim Jong-il is a loser. His latest rally was a flop. I feel bad for Ahmadinejad. He never… The man wears a windbreaker. He has no class. I, on the other hand, sell my own line of ties. You can find it at Macy’s. In the flammable section.

Through it all, Trump sat stone-faced, intently looking forward, but never laughing (or even looking relaxed) as he was peppered with zingers.

He evidently wasn’t happy that he had become the butt of the night’s best jokes, even though he himself agreed to Comedy Central’s proposition to have some of the country’s most foul-mouthed comedians roast him some time ago.

Then again, being made fun of by Lisa Lampanelli isn’t the same as being made fun of by the President of the United States in front of the White House press corps.

So now we know: Donald Trump can’t stand to be made fun of by people with more credibility than him.

That doesn’t bode well for his supposed presidential aspirations.

One Comment

  1. Jeffrey
    Posted May 7th, 2011 at 10:05 PM | Permalink

    I am appalled. This man can’t be president…I find this roast an insult to the American Public.

One Trackback

  1. By Quote of the Day | Stiffs and Georges on May 12th, 2011 at 11:40 AM

    […] “I like it that [Donald] Trump is filthy rich but nobody told his accent. His whole life is models and gold leaf and marble columns but he still sounds like a know-it-all down at the O.T.B.” — Seth Myers at the 2011 White House Correspondents Dinner (transcript here). […]