South Carolina starts primary civil war

When it comes to presidential primaries and caucuses, they're changing the dates again. And is it really a surprise that the state responsible for the two biggest disasters in American history, those being the Civil War and George W. Bush, is responsible?

South Carolina Republicans today moved their 2008 presidential primary to Jan. 19, triggering a chain reaction among Iowa, New Hampshire and other early voting states that could push the first balloting into December 2007.

South Carolina GOP Chairman Katon Dawson made the announcement with officials from New Hampshire, whom he called allies in protecting the traditional early states' voting order.

"We are here to stand shoulder to shoulder with our friends in New Hampshire to reaffirm the important role that both of our states play in presidential politics," Dawson said.

South Carolina had scheduled its Republican primary for Feb. 2, but at a news conference with New Hampshire Secretary of State Bill Gardner, Dawson said the change to Jan. 19 was needed to protect South Carolina's first-primary-in-the-South tradition.

Given the change, Gardner will be forced by state law to move the New Hampshire primary to at least Jan. 12. Iowa then probably would move up its traditional leadoff caucuses, perhaps to as early as mid-December.

Really, it's so obvious that I hate to say it, but the perfect date for South Carolina Republicans would be (rimshot ready, drummer:)

Oct. 31! (crash, snare, kaboom.)

I say we move all of them to Labor Day and get it over with. A year-long general election campaign would be just peachy. Imagine how many Swift Boat Liars commercials could be produced in a year!