New! Modern! It hurts!

I know some folks in the Portland-Vancouver metro may be excited about the planned spring opening of a certain Swedish self-assembly furniture store, but before people do that to themselves they might want to consider the experience relayed by Huffington Post's Danielle Crittenden.

The vast gray space was staffed by a lone "customer service" employee. A line had formed. I looked down at my list. Oops--I had not duly recorded the "bin" numbers of my items, which tell me where they are located in the two story aisles stacked with identical cardboard boxes. And in order to pick up my two "Ektorp" sofas, I had to have a paper from the furniture department stamped by the lone employee. Oddly, he did not exude the same spirit of Ikea friendliness as the "Need help? Just ask!" signs hanging overhead. As I joined the line, it occured to me that I would need a flatbed trolley in addition to my already overflowing shopping cart to transport my items to the checkout and the car. How was I going to manage this?

If Crittenden's story doesn't convince you, this instruction manual might.